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His right hand shoved my left breast, knocking me back. At the same time, he rolled over-top of me, this time moving to his knees, ending up straddling my hips.He grabbed my wrists. I fought back, trying to shove him off of me. This time, I didn't just push him away. I squirmed, turned, tried to kick, flailed my hands, all in an attempt to free myself - I let loose.I really didn't want to be fucked - or maybe I just didn't want a wimpy fuck. If I was going to get laid, I wanted it the right way. I wanted to feel a man on top of me.It quickly turned into a wrestling match, then a fight. My resistance fed his anger and his attempts to restrain me fed my strength. Both of us felt free - free from the restraints of loving-kindness that normally govern our relationship.We were free to do what we really wanted to do - to do it the right way - the normal way - to fuck like husbands and wives are supposed to fuck, not some feminist-bullshit, equal-rights, candy-ass, mother-may-I. "I was young once myself... I remember what it felt like to have your heart stomped on. You and Suki should be together and damn the opinions of others!"He left my office after that and I thought about what he had said for the rest of the day and most of the night. I did care very much for Suki - neither of us said the "L" word, but I had a sense that both of us felt it. At least I did and I hoped she did as well. The next morning, I knew I was to meet with Suki on the work project and I thought about what I would say to her. Mr. Baxter said he was going to talk to her about all this and I wondered if he had had the chance. I decided not to bring it up unless she did, just in case he hadn't spoken to her yet.Suki arrived right on time for our meeting - she was nothing if not prompt. And we got right into it. I kept glancing at her over the course of our work together that day, and from time to time, I caught her doing likewise. The air between us was tense and charged with a strange.
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